"Expectations are just disappointments in progress"
Has anyone else ever heard of this qoute? Im not sure if I entirely agree with it, but in this certain angle of this post-Im in agreement. I constantly end up disappointed from the high expectations I have on others.
My downfall is these expectations are either too high or unrealistic, or are just uncommunicated.
In my mind, I put these high expectations on people, whether its job performance with coworkers, or peers to obtain the same moral standards, or family to always come through, or friends to always be supportive, or my children to always be well-behaved.. I could go on and on. These high or unrealistict expectations will lead me to disappointment.
Im learning to consider a new point of view. For instance, I was recently disappointed over a certain situation with a friend. Her actions disappointed me terribly-more so because I expected something of her. Then my husband helped me realized there might be another perspective to look at. My view of her actions might not be the motive of hers. Does that make sense? My perspective doesnt always line up with reality. Its not my friends fault Im hurt or holding a grudge, it was my expectations that got me hurt Im suffering from those high unrealistic expectations.
Sadly, my birthday or special holidays like Mother's day always tend to end up in disappointment--because the day never pans out the way I expected it to. Ive learned to communicate with my husband that I expect him to aknowledge ME specifically on Mother's Day. Clearly communicating and sometimes negotiating with the person I have the expectations with seems to help. That way we can all be on the same page.
Lastly, its also been EXTREMELY freeing to be able to hold things "loosely". To be flexible and thankful with whatever happens-happens. Its a mindset Im learning to obtain!
So the quote "No expectations, fewer disappointments!" is something I try to repeat to myself often when it comes to these particular type of scenarios.
How do you deal with expectations and disappointments?
1 comment:
SERIOUSLY!? This has been at the forefront of my mind for the past few months. I have to constantly tell myself, when I'm upset, that its only because of my out of sight expectations for people. I've carried a lot of resentment because of this and am just now able to realize that its my own fault. Others are (presumably) doing their best but I am placing too high a standard on them.
You couldn't have posted this at a better time!
Life is so much better when you don't have to live up to something.
I now try not to envision how some event will turn out in advance, because it is NEVER anything near what you pictured, and it just causes problems.
Love you!
Post a Comment